When my daughter left for college, back in 2005, we packed her off with accoutrements. I cared that she lived in a space with comfort, which required a bedside lamp, a table, and rosy bed linens. I also gave her the rug my mother bought me in 1979 – Chinese wool, in desert-ish tones.
When my son left, in turn, I think he took only the blue and white striped duvet of his boyhood. Several perfectly good reasons. First, at 19, his home decor style was well-described as Clothes Make The Best Carpet, Don’t They? Second, he was sharing a very small room with a very large roommate. If one of them stood up, the other had to step aside. And finally, maybe, by this time we had divorced, and the orchestral symphony of care had quieted. Diminuendo.
So when he moved to Brooklyn I was ready. I sent him money to buy furniture, urged him to get a real bed in place of a mattress on the floor, chatted in text messages about this desk and that table. Of course, he ignored much of what I said. All is right with the world.
But I took the rug moment firmly in hand, via a Living Social deal. I bought it for him, under the condition that he share the purchase process with me. Ha! Mothers learn so many tricks over the years. He and I exchanged scads of emails, with links to our favorites. We reviewed this rug and that rug, some floral, some kilim, mostly in tones of blue. However, in the end, he settled on the one you see above.
As it turns out, I realize, it’s not unlike the one I gave his sister, given me in turn by my mother 35 years ago. At least five days out of every seven I make a wish that my children lived close by. Don’t worry punkins, I’m not saying that you need to come home right now. It’s just that everything about you is dear to me.
I wish all reading here a wonderful weekend.
Image: Rugs USA
28 Responses
I am so fortunate. All my adult children are here in California,close by, except my son in SD. He too, is going to school and learning about being Lakota. How I miss him. Loved your word. Diminuendo. Nice morning reading.
“At least five days out of every seven I make a wish that my children lived close by.”
Aw, we’re all so alike. So touching.
That rug is lovely, those colours fuse together so effortlessly.
I also smiled when I read tat you were going to take an active role shopping for the rug with your son :-)
BTW I hope your wish comes true…
we are so fortunate that our adult children are in the same city…
Our lovely daughter has a fellow in her life now who hails from NZ and Australia and there is talk of her going to meet his family at Christmas and who knows what the future holds?
Enjoy your weekend Lisa.
Does he have a vacuum cleaner?
Ha! SUCH a good question:). I do not know. I would doubt it.
That’s a beautiful rug. He’s lucky to have a mother with such good taste to pass down.
I wish I lived closer to my parent’s, but it is not to be, not just yet. I am lucky to be able to live close to my sister. It’s always an exciting morning when I get to see her on metro.
Ah! Hostess.. my son spent two years in Oz.. wonderful times! He was married and went back for a year, finally to return to live close to Lisa. I love, no, adore CA. I would move there in a blink.
Fearot.. even if she goes to NZ for some time it will be a wonderful experience. Aussies and Kiwis (NZ) are such warm great people!!! MY DDIL love it the several times she visited my son in Adelaide.
I gave some input re the house in CA prior to his meeting his wife, and it was well taken…But then his taste and mine run pretty much along the same lines..
Have a lovely week-end!
Cecile
Such a sweet post. I’m in the process of helping my daughter and new son-in-law, re-organize and re-decorate their place. Luckily both of our respective kids live in LA. When they were in college on the east coast, we moved there. When they moved back, we moved back – pathetic but true. I think yours will move back Lisa. All kids born and raised in California eventually do it seems.
Love the rug BTW. He has excellent taste.
That’s a great rug!
I’ve never got around to posting on something that touches this, ‘tho I think of it regularly — the joy and comfort of being entertained in one’s adult children’s home, their taste being made manifest so practically and, in my case and it seems in yours, so reassuringly. I love knowing that they can make, have made, a home of their own.
At least five days out of every seven I make a wish that my children lived close by.
I wish I couldn’t relate so much to that statement but I do. *sigh* I miss my adult children desperately sometimes.
I’m big on kitchenware – they are well-equipped in that area. I know; big surprise.
This made my afternoon. Not least because of the “Clothes Make The Best Carpet” characterization, with three brothers the line is more than apt.
Sending you a smile Miss LPC!
tp
We’re still in the “clothes make the best carpet” phase here. I do find myself purchasing household items now with the thought that they can take it with them when they go.
I love the rug…..and the word accoutrements.
Now, more than ever, everything about them is dear to me. Sniff, sniff!
Happy weekend to you!
XO
Almost everything you said sounds so familiar…
My son lives in Tokyo, my daughter in Brooklyn; rugs and kilims, linens and family heirlooms have been discussed, given, now immensely appreciated, and I marvel at the joy I feel seeing the cycles of different generations’ lives being linked and growing stronger and stronger!
Oh, Tokyo, so far away…
Heartwarming! I can so relate. My daughter and grandchildren are in Mass and I’m in Georgia. I always hope they will relocate to a ‘civilized’ climate.
The way you so openly adore and respect your now grown children is lovely. I hope that I inspire the same feelings from my own mom.
Thank you. I bet you do.
To be tossed crumbs from our children’s world are always tasty and leave us craving more.
Have a wonderful weekend, Lisa. :)
Lisa, It is apparent that your (grown children) have inherited their mother’s great taste!!
Xoxo
Karena
Art by Karena
I hope your children lived closer to you, or you had the chance of seeing them more often, maybe some day..
It is only natural for us parents to feel that way.
And it is only natural, that we wish to help them, when they are building their own nest, but ONLY, if they wish our aid.
I have tried not to influence my daughter with my ideas; all I have done, if asked, given my opinion.
Your son will manage just fine. The choice of the rug is a proof of that : ).
I am laughing as last year as freshman college drop-off, one twin had carpet in his University dorm and the other did not so we found a rug at the Dollar store near his College for $19 and it was perfect. Stripes so it would not show any dirt.
At the end of the year it was tossed – I would have loved to have given him a small persian or something fancier, but that rug fit the purpose.
Funny how as we grow so does our purpose and our many purchases for our offspring….I guess college tuition is the biggest magic carpet ride.
pve
He has wonderful taste. They don’t fall far from the tree do they.
Sam
When my daughter furnished her new home,she knew what she liked,and wanted.I think the only item we bought was the bed.Her taste had a slight nod towards mine.I would love to know how her style has developed.
I love the burgundy /green colours those are colours I have in a couple of rugs,my sitting room always seems to include them.
How adorable your son took his bed linen with him,memories of home I think.
Thank you for sharing your family. Ida
One way to keep him under foot is to know what his feet are on. Sweet!
A sweet post, in the very best sense of the word. Many years from now I hope he re-reads this, and stops and ponders — yet again — how wonderful it is (or was) to have a mother who loves him, indeed. Reggie
You all are lovely. He got the rug today and sent me a photo from his phone. So far so good. Thank you for sharing this with me.
Thsi is one of the loveliest posts. You are my absolute role model for how to not let go too much and never let them find out. So charming.
ELS
Your punkins are lucky to have a Mom like you.
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