Today I’d like to ask you to go read my friend Frances’s recent post on her blog, Materfamilias. (If, of course, you have not already.) She writes about her experience growing up in Canada, and about her mother, in light of recent discoveries in their residential schools. And then I’d ask you, if you are so moved, to donate to a fund building an Urban Indigenous school in the area where she used to live.
Frances’s post resonated with me for many reasons, but let me just refer to something personal. My mom was like Frances’s mom; committed to anti-racism and working to mitigate racism’s effects. Frances carried on with her mom’s teachings; me not so much. And when Obama was elected, I thought we were done.
We weren’t.
What Frances does so well is to understand two things that can be hard to hold at the same time. Yes, some people have been working hard for a long time to compensate for the damage done by our ancestors. But, also, yes, there is more to do. And here’s the important thing, you can acknowledge responsibility and at the same time, as long as you move forward to make things better, do not have to live in guilt.
Just commit to making things better, in whatever way is available. Life is short, and why else are we here?
Have a good weekend. I send you my deep affection and respect.
18 Responses
I am so moved and grateful that, even though a country away, a different history, you think my story is worth sharing and the cause I’ve chosen to support worth contributing to. (also, I suspect that, just being you, you probably did much better than you give yourself credit for, and I know you’re doing so much right now). I do think that we do well to explore our personal histories as a starting point for our engagement today with anti-racism (I think that Ibram X.Kendi, for example, does such a good job of this in his book, How to Be An Anti-Racist).
Thank you so much for your ongoing friendship and, today, for this encouraging linking. xoxo
You’re more than welcome. It’s a beautiful, and almost more importantly, many-layered post that reverberates after reading in waves.
Thank you for sending me to Frances’ post. We all need to know our history, including the parts that make us uncomfortable.
I agree. Being a moral adult means, in my opinion, being able to listen to painful truths.
I have not read the book mentioned but I will say I am not a racist. I acknowledge NO responsibility and think, since none of us were around when people died in the Civil War to solve this amongst other problems, it is dangerous to divide the Country in this way. How long and how often do we have to revisit the same problem when we sincerely try to help those in need and have for years. The Civil Rights Law that passed in 1964 was momentous and the protections in that law, along with subsequent laws such as the ADA show that we care and continue to evolve to solve societal issues.
We are being taken advantage of here. Pushing guilt on a generation of young adults and children just causes them to not have as much confidence needed to succeed in this world. Doing psychological damage in the name of equity is BS.
Be good – be kind – help those you see in need and hold your head high America! Happy Independence Day to all!
Ah, Betsy, I am so sad to read this. Your post is precisely the one I was writing to try and fend off. We have learned so much about our history since 1964. We can revisit problems when we’ve sincerely tried to help when there’s still so much more to do before all Americans can live equally under the law in all ways. If we think we did a good job at something, and we find out we didn’t, don’t we need to go back and do it again? That’s what I was taught.
If you think that reading true history in which your ancestors took advantage of or harmed other peoples is enough to shake young people’s confidence, imagine what it must be like for young people reading how their families were on the other side of the system. Be good, yes, be kind, yes, and exactly what I am trying to say in this post is that, and please hear me, acknowledging responsibility DOES NOT mean we can’t hold our heads high. It means that we have to listen to the truth, and we have to work to change SYSTEMS, not just be cheerful people in our day-to-day lives. Only if we do this will the deep split in our country, one which I too was unaware of, be healed.
What a deeply moving article. Thank you so much for referring us to Materfamilias.
You have hit the nail on the head here and I’ve had the same debate with family on our side of the pond about the removal of statues commemorating people involved in the transatlantic slave trade. I always ask people if they think it would be ok to have a statue of Adolf Hitler in Germany because it’s ‘part of their history’?
I don’t know if it is ok to put a link to a something on here but I thought it was relevant, it examines the incredible gesture of German Chancellor Will Brandt on host first trip to Poland after WW2. He was a celebrated anti nazi who spent the war on the run but still felt the need to apologise on behalf of his nation.
https://www.facebook.com/346937065399354/posts/5283202218439456/
I am OK with your link because it does not appear to say anything but truth. And I agree, Germany is a model for how a nation can acknowledge the wrongs done and still look forward and believe in an ideal. We can’t be so fragile as to deny the past, or so angry, at least not us of privilege, as to not move forward.
Thank you for pointing us to Frances’ blog and her deeply moving reflections on this shameful and horrific episode in Canada’s history. Indeed no country or religion is guilt-free in this respect to varying degrees.
On this our Independence Day, I have mixed feelings as a person of color. I am proud to be a citizen but recognize freedom has not been granted equally to all regardless of what the Declaration says. There is nothing wrong with national pride but national and cultural hegemony leads us down a dangerous road.
You are very welcome. Thank you for reading. I mean, I could have just written exactly what you say here, “I am proud to be a citizen but recognize freedom has not been granted equally to all regardless of what the Declaration says.”
I grew up in the knowledge that my country was difficult to love – for its atrocious history. In a different way – and I’d like to insist on this difference – this holds true for many countries which are trying to come to terms with their colonial past. What my mother taught me was that we have plenty of reasons to feel sorry, even ashamed, for what happened in the past, but, more importantly, we are responsible for making sure that nothing similar may ever happen again.
Let us all then honor your mother. It does hold true for many countries and we can be responsible for guarding the future.
It’s interesting that Betsy brings up the 1964 Voting Rights Act. That would be the the Voting Rights act that was first gutted when the Supreme Court struck down Section 4(b) as unconstitutional in its June 25, 2013, ruling. The majority opinion was delivered by Chief Justice John Roberts, joined by Justices Scalia, Anthony Kennedy, Clarence Thomas, and Samuel Alito. Just last week Section 2 was gutted in a six three decision. Every last white person in this country benefits from white privilege. Our lives are immeasurably easier that those of people of color. The truth of 1619, Juneteenth, the bombing and murders of Black Wall Street in Tulsa, and all of the other bombings and murders needs to be taught so white people understand what we’ve been. To this day there is redlining, and unfairness in loan availability. Ask a Black farmer in the south if he/she can get a loan. The truth of the Trail of Tears, the Alamo and the genocide of the First People needs to be taught as well. The white world view is wrong. Thank you for the link to Materfamilias, it was a master class in writing.
I had read Frances’s post about her mother and so much more. And I too had thought we had made so much progress toward equality when Obama was elected. Sadly this was not the case by any means. I am so distressed by the laws which are enacted on what seems like a daily basis to restrict voter rights. When I posted something on Facebook in favor of increased voting rights I think I got more negative comments from friends than anything I had ever posted. When I stated that those who did not have a drivers license for whatever reason might have a difficult time providing ID someone suggested they could just use their passports! Just yesterday I was reading a book about horses. There was a chapter in it on the Black cowboy. A large percentage of the cowboys in western US were in fact black, but their history has been erased. I am trying to read, listen and even contribute to organizations who promote justice and equality, what small amounts I can. On this July 4th, Independence Day, I fear for our country.
Acknowledging the problem is the first step in what will be a long journey.
Improving awareness and understanding of this important issue is critical. Equally important is taking action toward change. Much work remains.
Had to comment. Yours are few words, but perfectly on point. Thanks
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