Privilege Blog

Job Misplacement = Anxiety

When I first misplaced my job, I was secretly thrilled. At least during those moments when I could put aside the fear of dying homeless in my later years and sleeping under a freeway. I was thrilled because I so looked forward to sitting on my sofa for long, undisturbed stretches of time.

But now that I am actually here there is a small problem.

I might become part of the sofa. I might one day be unable to get up. Being unemployed means no structure to the day. No structure means stretching into endlessness. Unfortunately, this makes me feel like I might be dying. Now I am not in any kind of clinical state, so I don’t actually THINK I am dying. But a nameless dread starts to fill my being. I might just sit here on the sofa forever.

As a result, I am inventing myself the job of being unemployed. As in, sophisticated decision-making processes around how many pieces of toast to have. As in, deadlines for when I will exercise, when I will pay my bills. Arbitrary schedules for random but required tasks.

3 Responses

  1. Excellent idea. I suggest treats for every arbitrary task accomplished, e.g., one cupcake for every dish stacked/blog read, etc.

  2. I'm afraid to say there are entire generations of WASP's where either they were of the leisure class or their wives were at the very least. Only a boring person is ever bored and you don't seem to be such a person.

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