Privilege Blog

When You Just Can’t Be A Lifestyle Blogger Any More

Bear with me. Or not. I always appreciate your time.

2016 hit hard. We moved Mom as best we could, she has settled in, but Donald Trump became president. In my eyes that puts our most needy citizens at risk. I have to do something. For those who already know they won’t survive all ~1400 words below, and I do understand, let’s cut to the chase. I’m shifting my writing practice.

In Brief

I plan to write, for the most part, on new topics in a new venue. I won’t close up what we’ve built here, but I’ll be cutting back.

  • Privilege becomes something more like Kim French’s blog, Girls Of A Certain Age. I remember when Christine commented that although she disagreed with us, she thought Kim and I had good taste and she read us in that light. The thought stuck with me. I want to keep posting the short pieces you’ve seen recently, probably once a week. Topics to include: notable pieces of clothing and household goods; photos of my garden; maybe a few more pencil sketches.
  • I will write about my new focus, politics and society, here, on Medium (I’ll self-publish, kind of like a blog, but I won’t have to maintain the infrastructure.)
    • Why the new interest in what we might call “civics?” I know I’m not knowledgeable, but I wake up every day wondering about our country and wanting to make a difference. I was uneducated about style when I started Privilege, so I figure I’ll learn as I go along.
    • Why Medium? So as not to break Privilege. It’s a child of my heart, and we already know it’s not set up for political discussions.
  • I’ll post any outfit shots that seem interesting to Instagram. Probably  far fewer point-and-shoot Lisas on the blog going forward.
  • I’ll stay on Twitter for chat, quips, rants.
  • Saturday Morning posts will be occasional, and usually a summary of links to anything else around the web that seems noteworthy, including anything I might have written or said or photographed elsewhere that I want you to have access to. If you so desire.

This, my friends, is the plan. You might wonder, why?

In Not Even Remotely Brief Because Feelings Are Involved

Let us deconstruct.

I began this blog in 2009. In the beginning, it was personal, I was anonymous. I found my way to style blogging by responding to what the increasing numbers of readers seemed to enjoy. I found my stride, as one does. Along the way I have written about my identity, and party pants, in once place. I’ve explored, with your inestimable help,  feelings about my body, being a woman, work, being “cool” or not, art, and all the realities of Sturdy Gals.

You have taught me how to write, regularly and carefully. How to cosset inspiration. Thank you all so much.

But such self-exploration has been possible only because the world seemed safe. America, in my mind, had more than enough and was ready to share. Luxury, in that world, could coexist with compassion.

Here’s what I’ve realized. This blog reflected, if not overtly, my political beliefs about our country. Naïvely, I believed that by deconstructing privilege, my High WASP culture, I could in fact convince people that our highest goal is generosity. That when humans have what they need and believe they can get what they want if they only work hard enough, compassion follows like clean air after rain. I thought I was modeling well-behaved privilege, and I foolishly felt people might join me. Or change their minds.

It was all kind of unconscious.

Turns out that I’m actually the “elite,” and, I’m the enemy. Oh Lisa. How misguided to believe I might affect something so heart-lodged as political conviction? Turns out some people actually didn’t feel we had enough, and were angry or afraid of all of those who did or might.

So I have to stop exploring selfhood and society by writing about cashmere sweatshirts. I still want the sweatshirts, I may still search for the sweatshirts, but I cannot sit down and write at length intelligently or creatively about the sweatshirts. I can’t care enough.

Note, I do not judge anyone who does still care. There’s room for recreation. A need always for style, design, and art. But my words keep taking me elsewhere.

Straight out, Trump appalls me. (Note that conservatives and Republicans do not always appall me. Trump is different.) A loud alarm rings in my chest every morning. “Danger arrives. Gather information. You must lay everything you find on a white table in a white room to scan for patterns. You have to understand to protect the lives of people you care about, even those you don’t yet know.”

Unless I can see clearly I can’t help anyone. To see clearly I have to talk. To talk, well, I need to write. And I do not want to break Privilege. Political posts here have proven terribly divisive and I can’t stand division in a place where I have wished my son a happy 25th birthday, mused over sleeping next to my daughter, told you about my second wedding, and drawn goofy little pictures of flowers.

Hence the new plan.

How Will This Actually Play Out?

I have no idea. I hope you bear with me. It is, as always, your choice.

A Simple Favor I Ask Of You (Given What I Have Learned From Going On 9 Years Of Writing “Privilege” As Personal Discourse But Also A Lifestyle Blog)

When these decisions made themselves, for in the week of November 9th it felt as though I had no choice in the matter, the difficult parts of blogging became suddenly untenable. So I want now to tell you what the other bloggers you follow may face, and I want to urge you to support them.

The Hard Parts Of Blogging That Bloggers Don’t Complain About Because They Love What They Do

  • Technology (You have to keep updating your site, things break, you deal with clunky interfaces)
  • Scheduling (Blogging seriously really is a job, you plan, you schedule, you edit)
  • Balancing truth and privacy (How much do you share? How do you balance authenticity with the need to be useful or entertaining?)
  • Adhering to one’s values (It is possible to commercialize without selling out, but you have to have a very strong code of ethics, and you, and at least I, have to watch over myself carefully)
  • Comparison is the thief of joy (Some other blogger always does it better than you and even when you know why you do what you do, if you’re competitive at all, it rankles)
  • Really mean comments (Need I say more? I didn’t mind the comments about my hair, but about my values, that’s been tough. It has also made me feel that if I’m going to be arguing politics I might as well go all in)
  • Commenting in general (Replying to one’s own comments and commenting on other blogs becomes a writing project in and of itself. I actually hope now to have more time to comment on your blogs)

In other words, while I’m exiting substantive style blogging, I hope you give incremental increased support to my cohort. I will name a few who feel familiar in style and/or voice. Une Femme. Faux Fuchsia. High Heels in the Wilderness. Materfamilias, Grechen.

Maybe now you will start writing your own blog. It’s deeply worthwhile.


And, As They Say, In Closing, With A Heavy Heart

I can’t finish this without one more thank you. Wait, you know, I do not want to overstate my importance. I’m just a smallish blogger, with a wonderful, constant, intelligent, courteous set of readers who often write our best posts with their comments.

This is not my best writing. I’ve been drafting it for several weeks but maybe I’m just conflicted. At the end of the day, one says  Eloquence Schmeloquence and gets going.

But inside of me, in me as I sit here on the peanut-colored sofa wearing plaid flannel pajama bottoms, a very old Princeton sweatshirt, and a new pair of lavender sheepskin slippers that my son gave me for Christmas, it is, as High WASPs say when confronted with a surge of our own feelings, not inconsequential.

Thanks a million. A million billion million stars and feet in the water.



171 Responses

  1. My sentiments precisely. These are crucial times for our country.
    I’d like to maybe meet as I come to San Francisco frequently to visit my son.

    Best regards

  2. Wow, Lisa.

    All I can say is, good for you. Or, GOOD FOR YOU. Write on. I look forward to reading you on all three platforms.

  3. I have loved your current blog but I am looking forward to this new direction. I am having a difficult time with the current situation and need writers like you to help me find my footing. Thank you, Lisa!

    1. @Diane, Thank you! I will do my best to deconstruct the mess. Many of us are having a difficult time, and we just have to keep on keeping on.

  4. Saw this coming for exactly the reasons you stated. You can’t be talking about the latest purchase when your heart is bulging with political activity. I’m glad you will still be posting on occasion. I’ve enjoyed this blog for many years now. How do we get to your essays on Medium?

    I will miss your frequent posts, but I totally understand.


  5. oh, i get this 1000% (incorrect math for emphasis). in fact, i have thought about resurrecting my shuttered blog because i just cannot. take. it. any. more. the cognitive dissonance we’ve installed as president has me angry and, while in england, feeling like i have no outlet.

    to be clear, like you, i am not anti republicans (i find myself agreeing with david frum on twitter a LOT) but i am against willful ignorance. and pettiness. and vindictiveness. all of which seem to be in full supply over these last SIX DAYS!

    so i wish you well in this endeavor, and will continue to “chat” with you about these issues in the days ahead.

    xo and thank you for the inspiration and the clarity you’ve provided in this space for so long.

    1. @jane, Thank you for the company, and the inspiration too. I miss your shuttered blog, but, evidently, clearly, I get it;).

  6. Thank you so much for you words and honesty. I will keep reading, and keep hoping, and possibly start writing x

  7. Lisa,
    I have so enjoyed Privilege and your perspective on almost everything. And I, too, am dismayed at the current state of crisis in our beautiful country. I will read and follow Medium. I wish you peace and momentum.

  8. I was in the DC March last weekend because I just couldn’t not be there. I came home with hope and new inspiration to keep the fight going. I totally understand your feelings and appreciate your honesty. And I have very much enjoyed this blog- as I purchased one of the scarves you wore last summer, I think of you every time I wear it :)

    1. @Susan L, Ah, I loved the photos of the March, of all the marches. I attended a local rally – even in that one small city on the Peninsula we had 5,000 people. Do tell, which scarf?!? I love twinsies, as you know.

    2. @Susan L, I purchased the Bindya mixed color cashmere/silk scarf. I have loved wearing it in all seasons as both a wrap for a/c and around my neck in cooler weather.

  9. I already respected you so much for your insight and lovely way of inhabiting the world and now I respect you even more! Thank you for every break in my day….for the moments of beauty. I hope that living your convictions brings you contentment and purpose. I know the world will be a better place for all of us because of your energy and passion.

    1. @Kathryn, Such a kind comment. I do feel, if not content, filled with purpose. I’m also still teaching, and working with an immigrant group, and the engagement has been wonderful. Thank you.

  10. I completely understand and feel very much the same way (as you know) – my creativity and activity has shifted since the election…as have my interests.

    I will continue to follow your blog, just signed up to follow you on Medium, where I’ll look forward to your writing.

    These are very scary times, not just for the needy, but for us all. I applaud your bravery in making this public. XO

  11. See, this is why it was right for you to hear metal at the biker bar. You know exactly how long I’ve been hoping you would say these things about Trump here, and I am so glad you did. Fuck yeah, my dear friend. #ImWithLisa

  12. So well put. I’d expect nothing less fro you.

    I appreciate your move. This Sh*t hah gotten real real fast. Good lord the needs feed in the first 6 days is disheartening.

    Time to get off my duff and put more interest in what really matters. No act of kindness is too small in these dark days

    1. @Meg, I think it is, in some ways, exactly a “needs feed.” xox. You may find that action soothes the soul. I have.

  13. Lisa, I totally understand! These are very trying times and I am scared to death. I came to your blog late but I have so enjoyed your fashion muses these past few years. The last two years I have lost both my parents and my sister has been so overcome with grief she is unavailable emotionally along my brothers are fighting over the estate. My mother set things up so that my sister and I are cut out of decision making as she clearly felt boys are smarter than girls. Your blogs were always a warm fuzzy for me and I loved all the readers comments as well. I wish I could express myself like you do.
    So here we are with Trump and I am so upset I can’t sleep. My Christian friends all voted for him and it makes me so angry that they voted one issue. Abortion. And Hillary was so vilified that they felt they had no place to go.the lies that are everywhere are so disheartening. I’m looking forward to your new writings and I’m sure our paths will cross as we resist this President. Stay safe.

    1. @Denise, You stay safe too. Old biases towards women harm us in private as well as in public. I struggle sometimes to understand how abortion became such a touchpoint. Probably worth deconstructing, if I find I have the courage to do so.

  14. Standing with you. Understand completely. We’re in a new reality. It requires vigilance. I’m shocked to find us here. I believe the new occupant of the White House is also shocked. Yesterday I was answering a friend who was writing about the difference between empathy and compassion. I know a bit about this because my therapist recently explained the difference between the kind of empathy that takes over and drains when one takes on the emotional work of another and compassion, in which one stays separate but can understand and can help. In constructing my reply, I looked for an old article by the linguist Ben Zimmer on the term “skunked words” coined by Dwight Garner. Skunked words have lost their usefulness because they have a traditional and a new meaning simultaneously in use and the reader doesn’t know which one the writer intends. I was surprised to note that Ben referred to a number of articles written just prior to his article that mentioned the consternation of writers such as Meghan Daum when Obama used “nonplussed” incorrectly when referring to his daughters’ initial reaction to living in the White House. He meant they were fine with it, while the traditional definition of the word is “surprised and confused.” As I read, I felt a wave of sadness and of longing for 2009 when we felt enough confidence in our president, no matter our disagreements with him (and I had a number), to be discussing his use of language. Comparing that to the irrational rants from the Oval Office today leave me speechless. There have been many personal things in the last years of my life that have shifted my focus from things I once cared about. This election has been a watershed moving me beyond all of my personal concerns, which still matter very much to me, to a re-realization that the personal is political, and we ignore that at our peril. I admire the way you are adjusting what you choose to do based on new information and new feelings. I’ve been considering a blog, but as you note it is a lot of work, or Medium. For years, after a series of traumas, I’ve had writer’s block that I’ve been fascinated to note does not exist when I am responding to the work of another as it does when I’m facing my own writing. Keep inspiring me on this blog when you choose, and I will read you elsewhere as well. Sending you admiration, thanks, love, and support. xo.

    1. @Katherine C. James, Perhaps you might write always in response to a question you read elsewhere, which you include as the header to your post. A series of thoughtful and eloquent comments, in other words. It could model listening, much needed now. Just a thought. Writing regularly is hard work.

  15. I’ve mostly lurked but have to say thank you. This is more important than us missing your writing here. I haven’t been this alarmed about US politics and nuclear annihilation since the 80s, and now I have kids and worry about their world, or what will be left of it next week. And echoing Jane about David Frum, politics certainly makes strange bedfellows!

    PS In the past two months I’ve often wanted to ask you about #GrabYourWallet and boycotting Nordstrom’s etc. for carrying Trump merchandise but didn’t want to rock your boat. It’s a small thing I can do from Canada especially when for the Trumps, where money is their end all and be all.

    1. @Rebecca, The issues around #grabyourwallet are much in my mind. Rather than writing about it here, I plan to work to convince the retailers I partner with to change their policies. And I will change out the retailers I support if they do not show evidence of a shift.

  16. Lordy, big heavy sighs going on down here on the central coast. You were silent for so long, I figured something was up. Of course, I/we support you in your growth and change, but I did so much enjoy reading you. I will reread this post later on and adjust accordingly. :-/ Definitely good on you!

  17. Lisa, You spoke right to my heart today! Thank you & looking forward to tuning in to your voice on Medium!

    From a Resister in Seattle!

    1. @Paula, Resist. It’s going to be a long hard fight. This is not against Trump per se, just against every one of his policies that threaten the weak, the marginalized, and the suffering.

  18. NAIL HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!!!!
    I have NEVER been affected by POLITICS until NOW.
    I too wake up thinking what is happening TODAY!!!!!!


  19. Hello Lisa, In Taiwan I have been insulated from the daily updates, but have a sickening sense of foreboding about the next four years.

    I applaud your efforts to keep tabs on the political situation and turn your thoughts and writing in that direction. Please don’t forget that we will also need some respite from politics, even (or especially) when things get ominous.

    1. @Parnassus, Thanks. Taiwan of course is inhabited by many who fled a death oppressive regime, I wonder how this looks to those who arrived all those decades ago. Life is so complicated. And thanks for the reminder about respite, we’re only a week into this mess and everyone needs to keep up their strength.

  20. Thank you so much for your honesty! I really appreciate it. I am struggling with bloggers and Facebook posters who refuse to acknowledge the current situation in our world and move as if nothing has happened to us. I am relieved and appreciative to see that my favorite bloggers have marched, commented on our world, and speak about their true feelings. Just because a woman talks about fashion or style, doesn’t mean that she does not have the brain or heart to speak out. I will follow you to your new blog and look forward to your thoughts and actions. It’s time for all of us to move forward – together!

  21. Lisa, thank you for this post. I believe many people have been profoundly changed by this election. Go forward, I will follow you where ever you go!

  22. I had a suspicion you were working behind the scenes when all I’d seen lately are your short pop up pieces about fashion. I am feeling the same quandary about the direction of my online presence. How can I post pics of the grandson and sketches of Cape Cod when our country is falling to pieces around me? I’ve been more political online in the last few weeks than I’ve ever been. I know I’ve alienated relatives – one of whom you replied to eloquently when I tried to summarize my pro choice position – but at this point in time, there’s no going back. So looking forward to reading you on Medium.

  23. Thank you for this, love. I found it both interesting and heartening. You give voice to what so very many of us are feeling right now and we appreciate the effort immensely. I will, as so many have said, follow you right on into the jaws of hell.
    You go, girl!!!

    1. @Gail, I feel braver for this. Thank you. It’s not going to be a lovefest, this new venture, I know that. I can only hope I’m ready.

  24. I too have mostly lurked, only occasionally posting but I have thoroughly enjoyed your missives over the last couple of years. Today even thinking about style seems to have no substance – it’s slipped from my fingers and slid down my priorities. Your post went right to my heart, I feel cast adrift from some of my countrymen and women. From across the pond I send you my very best wishes – here in the UK back in June when we severed our links with our closest neighbours I too went through similar emotions that you and other posters have shared here and I am still reeling in shock at the direction in which we seem to be heading. I believe we must all, together, resist this this trend, this dismissal of experts, this relishing of blame and we must continue to argue, discuss, debate and keep questioning. Never have the words ‘not in my name’ resonated so loudly. I will continue to read and follow you on all your platforms – stay strong. Together, united, we will never be defeated.

    1. @Julia, “I believe we must all, together, resist this this trend, this dismissal of experts, this relishing of blame and we must continue to argue, discuss, debate and keep questioning. Never have the words ‘not in my name’ resonated so loudly.” Thank you.

  25. Lisa, I share your horror at the election of Trump. I truly believe a large part of our country voted for him, not on any particular issue, but because they love the daily drama he generates. They come home to their boring life and think “I can’t wait to turn on the TV (or computer) and see what he said today.” It’s a reality show world now and we all lose…

  26. Applause! I wondered what the plan was and I’m excited to see it rolling out. You have a powerful voice, and you have shown through this blog that you wield influence. Taking that to the political sphere is a logical extension given your passion, values, and intelligence. Thanks for the mention, and I look forward to talking more about this in person before too long. xo

  27. Lisa I’m so looking forward to reading you on Medium. I’ve enjoyed your blog over the years very much and I thank you for it. Times have changed and so have we. Sending you strength and love! xx

  28. We in the U.K. have turned our back on Europe & our PM is now on her way to the US to align us with Trump . At the very least , 48% of us disagree with this . I can see exactly why you are making changes & admire & respect your integrity .

  29. You expressed yourself perfectly well. Lots of people I know have been asking themselves “what can I do?”. You’ve got a bully pulpit already, so it makes perfect sense that this is your way forward. I look forward to your posts over o Medium, knowing they will be both thoughtful and thought-provoking. Good luck.

  30. Thank you for your gifts of writing, humor, style and more. Will miss you but am glad to be able to see you along the way.

  31. Have been following you on Twitter so am happy to see you will be writing on Medium. Looking forward to your thoughts.
    You are doing the right thing!

  32. I’ve been reading you a long time. I’m still with you on all platforms. Thanks for being so thoughtful. We will all march on.

  33. I so hear you. You met (virtually) my human in 2009. In 2013 her world blew apart. At the end of that year, I entered her life and we began down the path of training and tricks and recovery. It all held together until my human was sucker punched by the election. It took until about a week ago to pull ourselves together and start up again.
    For us, those-in-the-know said a blog was our path, but it is a fashion blog from the point of dog. Happy but trivial. “You mustn’t politicize Lola, said those-in-the-know. “Everyone must love her”, they said.
    So our quandary is real because there are so many more important things other than cashmere sweaters and dog tricks. We cheer you and rally behind your decision but are sad that publicly we will be left on the political sidelines especially in an era where each and every voice counts. In our heart of hearts, we are with you.
    #Resist. #RiseUp. #RaiseUp. #PawsUp
    Caron & Lola

    1. @Little Lola Sunshine, Thank you. I know that some who feel as I do need and want to keep their blogs and their work as it is, I support that. Not everyone has to go down this path, and I myself feel support from people chiming in and don’t require that they act in lockstep at all. I hope life is treating you better now. xox.

  34. Your blog voice has been an inspiration and I have enjoyed reading your posts over the years.
    Just signed up to read what you write on Medium…the political climate is very precarious and we are watching from the north and some of us are holding our breath… waiting.
    You are not alone in this arena…supporting your new venture and wish you luck!

  35. Whether I agree with you or not (and mostly always I do), your beautiful, intelligent writing is oh so very persuasive! I love reading anything you have to say. I carry many of your words in my heart and mind and pretend they’re mine (it makes me feel smarter, better). I will follow your blogging adventures anywhere! Lots of love!

    1. @Paula, Such incredibly kind words. Thank you so much. I only hope I can muster some persuasion in this new direction. My words are always yours.

  36. I support you, and thank you.

    I love knowing you have this voice and passion. It would have been devastating to find out that you did not.

    Thank you for adding your voice. I look forward to standing beside you. You have much to offer in the civic activism space. I can’t wait to see what you accomplish.

  37. I’ll be wearing my Yertle T-shirt at work on casual Fridays. And Sneetches. And Horton. And Lorax. T-shirt rebellion. And, as a children’s librarian, I probably won’t be fired for political rhetoric. You go, girl.

  38. You have my admiration and respect for what you are doing. All I hear in the every day world is people’s concern and worry at the direction the new president is taking us. Be blessed in your venture and thank you.

  39. I have followed your blog from New Zealand since 2013. I commented on your pre election post. I have really enjoyed your blog and will continue to follow you on Medium. I have a warm affection for the USA having lived there in the late seventies. I still have many lovely friends in Colorado who I visit often. Watching events unfold in the states today is like watching a train wreck in slow motion. I find myself horrified, incredulous and grief stricken that a country I care about so much should be divided in this way and with every executive order that comes I find I just can’t look away. Trumps actions and particularly the brand of isolationism and nationalism he promotesu will affect the rest of us. While he attacks international alliances and signals a withdrawal of the USA from parts of the world stage he will affect the balance of power because as we know from the Middle East experience others will step into the void. This is not just about a new era in America it’s about a new World order. I didn’t march in the women’s marches in NZ as our small city didn’t have one but my daughter marched in Christchurch and many friends marched in Auckland. We must make our voices heard. I look forward to hearing more of yours.

  40. Like a great ship unshackled from its moorings, you sail towards another (political) ocean where, I am certain, your fortunate readers will once again enjoy your new course.

    All the best Lisa, and I look forward to your posts.

  41. :( I am going to miss you here but am signed up to follow you on Medium. What’s happened with the election and everything that has followed is so disheartening. I dread what is coming in the next four years and fear that it might stretch to eight years! Trump has referred to his next eight years with alarming regularity as though it is done deal. I agree that the ACLU is a priority and needs our support. So does Planned Parenthood, the Public Broadcasting System, publications like the Washington Post and the New York Times, just to name a few. Thank you for taking this new direction. I will always continue to follow you. I will check back here as well.

  42. Oh, and one last thing. I am sitting here in my new lavender sheepskin slippers (Uggs), a Christmas gift from my daughter, too! Twinning :)

  43. I’m another lurker, but have thoroughly enjoyed reading your blog for several years. I couldn’t agree with you more about the state of our nation. Trump scares the hell out of me with his lack of concern for human rights. I fear the new world order that will be a consequence of his actions. I will certainly support and read you on Medium. I may even comment!

    I am trying to find ways to resist this administration and look forward to reading some suggestions.

  44. Well said. I’m with you (and Wendy in York). These are alarming political times and we should stand up; if I could write like you I’d be doing the same thing. Needless to say I’ll still be tuning in.
    Very best, Alyson

  45. I understand and will continue to read your posts,here and there,I like the way you think and write
    Life has a lot of facets,more or less impotant-you’ve choosen the right one now
    “World is a global village”indeed-things are going to change not only in US,I’m afraid

  46. Lisa, I applaud your decision and will run right over to Medium to see what you write. As for me–I haven’t been sleeping lately and the world looks a bit dark. It means a lot to have friends who are along for the journey and willing to help find our direction.

  47. I’m sad that you’re scaling back Privilege, but totally, totally understand why. I’m not American and yet I feel emotional at the news each and every day. It’s been hard to focus on what’s happening here in Canada, in the face of the media barrage from south of the border. And yet we can’t look away.
    I applaud what you’re doing, Lisa. And as others have commented, I’m not surprised. You have many gifts….and I look forward to hearing what you will have to say going forward. Thanks so much for the mention. High Heels in the Wilderness is but a baby in the blog-osphere…but we strive to be as good as Privilege has always been.

  48. One more well wisher from a reader with a lotta years under her belt. At 82 I may not even be in this dimension in 4 more years but I am very much concerned about our country and our planet. We need your well written voice. Thank you.

  49. I understand. Your paragraph about an alarm ringing in your chest every morning was exactly right. My husband’s habit is to turn on the news each morning when we awaken. These days it has become a horrible way to start the day, but I find I cannot stop, not then, not throughout the day. It is as if I must stay vigilant in an effort to understand.

  50. I will miss “Privilege,” but I understand. I closed up my blog a couple of years ago. I believe one can only write on a particular theme for so long before the enthusiasm is dampened.

    The full impact of this man will only be known down the road, but Narcissistic Personality Disorder is not a helpful trait in a world leader, and there is no amount of talking or protest that will change who he is. Looking to the future, I doubt that there will be eight years, and maybe not even four. Good luck in future endeavors. I hope to find “Medium” so that I can continue to read what you write.

  51. Well done,Lisa. I have been reading your twitter entries and perfectly understand your decision to change (some) directions.

    It is more important than ever that people of good will, understanding and intelligence speak up – you are doing the right thing.

  52. I am grateful for the opportunity to continue to follow your thoughts and perceptions on Medium. And I am grateful for your efforts in writing this blog, and for your honesty in choosing to concentrate on other things in these dark times. Perhaps (probably), I will find myself agreeing with your writings and following your lead.

  53. Lisa, For someone who works hard to find humor, I am having a difficult time just now…We are living in the Twilight Zone…In an altered place that our precious country has never experienced…
    I go to bed at night exhausted from trying to be upbeat and not to dwell on the complete craziness of this presidency…The total idiocy of our elected leader..
    So these things considered, I applaud your choice to write, reflect and add some degree of understanding …to those of us who are wandering in the wilderness..
    I will miss PRIVILEDGE but I will definitely read MEDIUM…Wouldn’t have it any other way…
    Thank you for the priviledge…I thoroughly enjoyed your fun…
    However, I need salve for the soul and can’t wait for your wisdom…
    Hang in there, Lucy…

  54. What your blog has done really well is intersect cerebral and quotidian commentary. While ostensibly a lifestyle blog, it’s more than that. Although it must be terrible to deal with attacks on your values, and commenters who are rude, I wonder if you you will have as diverse an audience at Medium or whether that will just be a silo for people who think the same way? You may be able to effect more change here than there. Just a thought. I will read you in both places and best of luck!

  55. Dark clouds have been hanging over me for weeks–I don’t remember feeling this way after any other election. Lisa, I so enjoy your tweets–they are one of the brighter patches to at look these days. I too applaud you and support your efforts. I look forward to reading more of your commentary.

  56. Thank you, Lisa. Every morning I fear turning in the news. Not living in the US, I have no influence. Please say and do what you can. I’ll follow you on Medium.

  57. Good for you. I have signed up to follow you. My husband and I are half crazy almost all of the time because of that man. I’m calling, sending postcards, but it just doesn’t seem to be doing any good.

  58. Lisa

    Thank you and deepest admiration for taking this stand.

    I look forward to being able to support your writing and photography on all your chosen platforms.

    SSG xxx

  59. Count me in the chorus of your loyal readers who understand your move and share your current concerns. Brava!

    There is a big need to find ways and places to restore a civil discourse and discussion between people who do not agree. Possibly you can help! And even if that tall order is beyond possibility, I look forward to your genuinely searching explorations and insights over on Medium. There will always be new shoes, but this current situation is urgent and I’m glad you’re stepping up.

  60. Go get um, Lisa–I am right with you. this man appalls me, and has to be stopped. Somehow or other we will bring him down. I am a member of Te Resistance, and we will prevail. xoxox

  61. I both understand and respect your decision to move a bit away from the style blogging. It’s been such a difficult time for so many of us who thought we were done with, or perhaps had shuttered, our activism. I recently heard Gloria Steinem speak at a local event and was moved to write this, although I am no writer.
    “She listened.
    Suddenly, missing pieces of her warrior soul slid firmly back into place.
    Surprise. She thought those long lost to time, convention, new places.
    ‘Not lost,’ her younger woman heart gently scolded.
    ‘Set aside. Until just now.’

    I will look with pleasure for your new writings. They will reflect many of us, privileged or not.

  62. Totally understand Lisa. Thank you for all your writing to date. I have appreciated the effort & energy it takes to produce each post.
    I will continue to read this blog and the new writings even if we live in Australia. I know that my 15 year old daughter and my 13 year old son will also want to read your new platform as they followed the US election & were very intrigued by the outcome. After the outcome was announced, I told them to focus on what Obama said, you must take action if you want change! Wishing all the best & thank you again

  63. Lisa, You are amazing . Love your blog. I feel similarly…. am lifelong Republican, but this person is just beyond the pale. Scary times, and feel the need to take action too. Will be cheering your next project on. Brava, Lisa, brava.
    -Linda, NY

  64. (Reply from Lisa. This was a link which I think was supposed to insult me. Since this person is using a false name and an anonymous email to sign in, (, how well I know you now…) I have taken it down. Anyone is free to disagree with me at any time, but I’m done with anonymous insults. If Hmmm would like to put up another comment with a real email address, I welcome the input.)

  65. Yup, knew this was coming. I have read your blog because I like your writing and am interested in how you think. Naturally I will take a look at your new place on Medium.

    I know you and I are on similar paths to figure out what the heck we need to be doing now. I have the privilege to be able to speak out and act without much regard to consequences at this stage of my life. It’s new territory to do more than have opinions and vote, so I’m refining my intake of information as well as figuring out what my output will be.

    Oops, too much about me. Thanks for all you are doing and thinking about.

  66. There is so much I’d like to say, but I’ll settle for a big thank you for the delight that has been Privilege and for the promise of Medium.

  67. I’ve been reading here at Privilege for years and want to thank you, Lisa, for sharing your intellect and strength, your humor and wisdom, the journeys of your life and lessons learned, and your abundant compassion. I will miss this sturdy little gathering place, but I truly understand that you must follow your heart. I look forward to hearing more at Medium. When I see all of the people who are standing up for our beautiful country, how can we ever give up hope? All the best to you and thank you! (from one of those artsy-cousin types!)

  68. Lisa, I am so happy to hear that you will be focusing your thoughtful, wise, clear, and compassionate writing on the alarming changes in our country. I am sorry to hear about your struggles with nasty commenters, because I also enjoy the community you have created. Today, it is a comfort to me to read comments from women around the world who share my concerns. I hope to continue to hear these voices, but especially look forward to reading your thoughts. Thank you for everything!

  69. I have always appreciated your fashion and lifestyle writing, starting even before you gave me advice about what to wear to my son’s wedding back in 2010 and continuing right up through the Christmas tea towels. I will miss you here, but will follow you there. I was concerned that you might be disappearing, so I am very pleased that you will be writing about topics that are so close to my heart and so important.

  70. I found your blog through a link back in 2009. Thank you for staying with Amid Privilege this long. It’s been a pleasure to laugh, commiserate and think along with you. Wishing you the best.

  71. Well, missy, it seems you and I have grown up together in the blogiverse, haven’t we? Class of 2009. Rah! I feel blogging has changed so much since we began. For a couple years now, at least for me, it hasn’t held the same passion it once did. It’s so fast paced and cumbersome for all the reasons you mentioned. I’m also concerned for young women who grew up with this technology as I often read on their own creative themed blogs that they are struggling with burn out and depression all because they feel they can’t keep up with new material and the process required to publish a post with photography. These bloggers are barely 30! Sometimes I’ll write them a private maternal-blogger type email and tell them it’s okay to walk away for awhile. They never answer, as I don’t expect them to, but I hope it gives them a moment to pause and think.. I’ve always felt a heap of gratitude blogs didn’t orbit my skies until my nest was almost empty by a few months. The early days of blogging definitely filled a purpose for me but like you, my friend, now I want more and at my pace. Perhaps it is because we are those “women of a certain age” and we feel an urgency. I don’t know. Another question to chase while dressed ever classic and jeweled. Looking forward…. xoxo

  72. It’s good to know that people care so much about what is going on in the world. Activism is required. I love your writing and have really enjoyed your blog and found solace and wisdom here – hoping you’ll continue to share when you can. Good luck. Solidarity! x

  73. Lisa,
    Thank you very much for this blog and I look forward to finding you over on Medium.
    Have to say, that reading all these wonderful comments felt like a huge group hug!! Very inspiring, fills my heart!

  74. I loved your old blog but am relieved about the new direction. It’s time for all of us…

  75. I think Trump has awakened a political engagement in many people which didn’t exist before – I certainly feel angry in the middle of my chest every time I see him taking any decision & wonder what on earth we can do to ameliorate his actions whilst also trying to make sense of my own country’s actions around Brexit.

    Can you put up a link to follow you on Medium – it’s not something I’m familiar with.

  76. I have been reading your blog on and off for several years now. I skipped many of your fashion and lifestyle posts. Not my taste, far beyond my means, not my priority. But I enjoyed all your posts about your family, about life in northern California (including schools), about certain social types. In your words, when you “deconstructed Privilege”. I admire your keen insights and the elegant way you put them into words. I absolutely understand why you are changing your focus now I’m looking forward to following you on Medium.

  77. Great move. Since the election and especially since last Friday I have realized how many blogs I read our so frivolous in light of the scary things happening to our country. I am glad to see you take this new direction.

  78. Two things:

    I am a firm believer — and living proof — that something good can come out of something bad, and it often does. I respect and admire your new direction, and I feel strongly it’s the path you are meant to be on at this point in history.

    Secondly, thank you. I’ve been a terrible blogger/blog reader/blog commenter this past year, but I will never forget how kind and supportive you’ve always been to me and my little blog. Your content and words have inspired me too many times to mention, as well as your thoughtful and generous spirit. So very grateful for all you’ve shared and all you will continue to share.

  79. I will miss the fashion/style posts here, but follow along in other internet spaces. Wish you all the best!

  80. Although I am sad at the scaling back of Privilege, it seems this has been coming for some time, and I think it is wonderful. There come times when we must break out or risk strangulation. You have a powerful voice, and a good heart combined with profound intelligence and you must do what you must. I am looking forward to whatever you have to say, wherever you might say it. None of us are simple creatures. go forth.

  81. So this 81 year old expat American now living happily in Canada found herself in Washington, DC last weekend with a sign made by her grandson that said “I can’t believe I still have to do this sh*t”. We must continue to engage however we can. Michael
    Moore suggested calling our representatives every day and letting them know what we expect them to do. I applaud your shift and look forward to following you on your new blog. Lifestyle and fashion just don’t rea;;y resonate at this point. A very small series of pictures posted somewhere yesterday of the Obama/Trump meeting at the While House showed Trump rushing up the stairs while Melania was still getting out of the car. No regard for anyone other than himself. Can the invocation of the 25th amendment be far off?
    Thanks again for you god words.
    Barbara from Guelph

  82. Back when I lived in Texas, I published the blog Rock the Silver, where you were featured early into your journey toward gray hair. I gave it up after five years mostly due to job pressures. I still have the job, but I’m in California now. I’ll retire before this administration is over, and I’m thinking, “What’s next?” I am sickened by Trump and want to do something, but I don’t know what. I’ve been keeping a journal and write down ideas every day on my lengthy Silicon Valley bus commute. Let me know if you need some South Bay support! Congratulations on making this important decision.

  83. I totally understand your decision and I will follow you over on Medium. I look forward to your new focus and I am sure you will offer a much welcomed “sturdy gal” perspective. Thank you for all your many posts, I have always enjoyed them! Suz from VancouverS

  84. Yay you! As much as I will miss your lifestyle posts, I am so glad you’re doing this. I can’t let go of the low-grade but constant panic I’ve felt since the election and have become impatient with many of the lifestyle blogs I used to enjoy. You write beautifully and with such grace. I’m really looking forward to your new direction. XXX

  85. I understand completely. I have a similarly heavy heart, and I haven’t had the stomach to read lifestyle blogging, no matter how much I still need to put clothes on my body. I have no doubt that you will approach this new matter with all the honesty and integrity you’ve shown all along. I’m looking forward to reading all of your writing, political and otherwise.

  86. I hear you. I feel you. I am now following you. I hope you get discovered and write for political publications – newspaper column! You are way too intelligent not to be ‘discovered’. Best xxxx

  87. Wishing you well on your new path Lisa although from a personal selfish point of view am really disappointed.
    I found your blog varied and interesting and you are certainly an inspiration. – your strength of character, intelligence, style, compassion and warmth were all conveyed thru your skilled writing.
    So many are writing about Trump and politics it is overload for me –
    I’ll miss your musings.
    All the very best to you

  88. I knew this was coming. Sure as rain, I knew it. It was written in invisible ink here on the many days you didn’t post.

    Versions of your transition are happening everywhere. Many of us are struggling to talk openly with long-time friends we thought we knew, but are now discovering we haven’t really known for a long time, if ever.

    It turns out (in my life) that discussions about books, movies, fashion and cooking only masqueraded as soul-connections. And in my life, those who didn’t share their true values until now are the ones now offended that I’m offended.

    The counsel of the day is that we must learn how to talk to each other, meaning that we must listen better. Thus far, after attempting that I’ve been rendered nauseated or “nauseous” as that word’s new definition apparently permits — a nauseating subject for another day.

    Back to my point: It’s been upsetting to learn that some of my oldest friends have been politely stringing me along for decades, leading me to believe we were sympatico. As would be expected, my new knowledge makes me feel like an idiot. But it does not put me in a forgiving mood. I am royally pissed.

    I look forward to reading your new blog. I will look here for notice of its address. After all, it was you and your mind I was interested in. Not the pearls.

  89. Oh no! Your posts have been a Saturday morning highlight (in particular, but also the weekday ones) for years. I’ve thoroughly enjoyed your intelligent musings on all sorts of topics.

    I’m responding to the currently horrific situations in the UK and US by burying my head as far and as firmly in the sand as possible. There are dozens of new horrors every day and I just cannot cope with even a portion of them. In my working life I’m working to improve one small part of the UK’s beleaguered health and social care system. Off duty, I’m looking at gardens and cute animals and lipstick…

    May God have mercy on us all!

  90. I so much appreciate all the blood. sweat, stomach lining and tears that go into efforts like Privilege. I have frequently recognized things about myself in reading your thoughts (long lost east coast cousin perhaps?) and other things I don’t expect to feel/think/experience. But one never knows, life is (with luck) long.

    May we all survive 2017 – at the moment it seems questionable. I’ll be looking for you on Medium.


  91. “Turns out that I’m actually the “elite,” and, I’m the enemy. Oh Lisa. How misguided to believe I might affect something so heart-lodged as political conviction? Turns out some people actually didn’t feel we had enough, and were angry or afraid of all of those who did or might.”

    There is “The Elite” who make the political rules, and there is “The Coastal Elite” who support them because the policies benefit them, or at least don’t hurt them. You are the latter rather than the former.

    At 58, I’ve been around long enough to see that far more people are struggling than in my younger years. Income inequality has risen dramatically, and the top 10% have more than ever, while the bottom 90% has less.

    Since NAFTA: Fully HALF of Americans make $30,000 or less (Google it), and a recent study found that 57% of Americans can’t cover a $500 emergency.

    When you say “Turns out some people actually didn’t feel we had enough” I have to ask who this “We” is.

    It isn’t you, because you have more than enough. Your life of early retirement and international travel is about as far from their reality that you might as well live on different planets.

    It’s not realistic to ask the half of the country who are in real pain to ignore that pain. One candidate addressed it for a change, and one did not.

    Trump has already stopped the TPP in his first few days in office, and NAFTA is sure to follow. The real test is if he can bring back jobs. If he does, then pardon the pun, but it will trump every other issue. The democrats have no chance to win in 2020 either if he actually changes people’s lives in such a huge way. We shall see.

  92. Reading and lurking since 2009…what a Lovely Ride, Lisa.

    Living in the red state of Georgia…your commentary has been a fresh breeze, indeed…and has brought back some sweet memories of another time in my life of living in beautiful California. Looking forward to your musings on Medium…..

    Dark Times, but I will heed the call to make some small difference myself and will look to you and others for inspiration…. Thank you.

  93. As a fellow Princeton alum (Class of ’77!), I discovered your blog completely by accident, but read it regularly because of your commonsense, practical, and tradition-based-but personally-expressive approach to style. So glad you are devoting your talents and attention to becoming a more focused an active citizen in these troubling times. Stay true to yourself, and Godspeed!

  94. Long time lurker of Lisa’s always thought provoking (and fun) website. Richard I wish I could be as deluded as you seem to be about our future. If being worried about what Trump can(?will) do to our democracy as well as our neighbors on this planet makes me a “special snowflake” then so be it! I will accept your insult as the compliment I know you didn’t intend.

  95. I’ve got tears in my eyes, Lisa. Your integrity, sense of humor, wit, compassion and style have always come through, loud and clear, in the words you wrote. Even though I haven’t consistently followed here, I’ve kept track of you through Instagram and still felt like I had a point of contact with you. Now, it’s a matter of sharing the same concerns about our country with you. Maybe we’re more bonded than ever.

    I will follow you on Medium for nuggets of wisdom about what we can do to create a better world. I know I have to do something…be more engaged, continue to stand up for the marginalized, and yes….listen to other voices I might disagree with.

    Thank you for 9 years of the “Privilege” of being a reader of your blog.

  96. Far out this makes me sad to read, I love your blog, and I always comment in my head if not in real life. The 1st post I ever read was about nail polish! I understand though that you are taking a new path and wish you all the best. Your comment about discipline and authenticity on my blog was one of my favourites ever. I am going to watch medium too. Sat in touch xxxx

  97. Very powerful Lisa. Even though I’m far away from the US I feel the pain and am fearful. It seems trivial to write about style when all this is going on. What’s happening today is just beyond belief. I applaud you! I decided to stay silent on politics in my online space but I must say that I find that increasingly difficult.

  98. I look forward to reading your new work, and I will continue to stalk you on Instagram. You are such a bright spot in the blogging world, and I cannot wait to see where your new journey takes you!

  99. Thanks for this blog. Whatever and wherever you write, I will read. I understand the desire to focus on important things. I feel the need to be more of an activist these days…cried this weekend watching the news. As a woman and naturalized citizen, I am taking steps now the support causes that matter in the 2017 (Virginia gubernatorial) and 2018 elections.

  100. I haven’t commented on your blog in ages but have always enjoyed your perspective and appreciate your evolution. I will always love fashion, but these days communicating about the rapidly changing political landscape and activism has taken a front seat. There is so much at stake.
    Thanks for keeping up a wonderful blog all of these years. I am sure that it took a lot of work and I appreciate it. I look forward to reading your new blog, Medium.

  101. Lisa- please help me understand Medium. I don’t see how to comment. Long time reader of Privilege, I’m so glad you’ve been called to change focus from that which now seems irrelevant. But I struggle with how to absorb it. A small example – my husband (he retired, me generating cash flow and insurance coverage til I too reach 59 and 1/2 and can access accumulated funds) have agreed that if either of us are to get arrested due to “overreach” at a rally, it best be him. But we still are struggling to find our way with personal equanimity. So he’s peacefully reading across the room while I read your latest missive on medium. The NYT interrupts to tell me of the shooting at an Ottawa mosque. “Jesus” I mutter through my inbreath. “What?,” he asks? Do I share the latest cause of my distress or let him absorb the next bad news in his own time and choosing? This new world raises a boatload of new and unexpected questions.

  102. This blog can await your return. In the meantime, yes, a woman’s place is in the resistance.

  103. I am waving my sixteenth-birthday pearls in your general direction, and wishing you a fair wind and good sailing as you move on.

    You truly deserve all the praise that your many readers have expressed here, and I certainly share in their heartfelt thanks for all that you have given us, and in their understanding of why you are making a change, and why that change must be now.

    Godspeed, dearest Lisa, and much love…

  104. Hi Lisa, Teresa here from Australia. I’ve read lots of great writing of yours this morning and feel this new direction is from a deep longing for meaning. May I please say from my heart that if you will only search you will find that meaning is actually a relationship with God. I know part of you is now eye rolling! But I became a Christian at 11yrs of age and grew up chatting to God down the paddock and truly knowing ( and I mean loving and being loved by God) is the most fulfilling and indeed the end of all meaning. Anyway I know that’s out of left field and I am not political sorry feel quite miniature in that department! Keep searching beautiful Lisa!! Love always, Teresa

  105. I have delighted in your blog ever since I discovered it, and look forward to reading the new thing. Keep shining on, Lisa.

  106. Well done for speaking your mind and standing up for what you believe (isn’t that what the USA is supposed to be all about?). There are countless blogs about cashmere sweaters and capsule wardrobes and what not, but how can an intelligent human being remain impervious to what is going on around us? I read your blog occasionally and I was always impressed with the language and the quality of the posts; I will probably read the new blog a lot more often! “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men (and women) should do nothing.”

  107. You aren’t the only blogger contemplating this change of direction and the how much do I tell/how much do I hide question. But yes, I don’t really think this is the time to be writing about cashmere or quinoa. We are on the very cusp of change and if you aren’t alarmed, you aren’t paying attention. Best of luck in the new venture and I shall do my best to follow you as you write your way into a new year and a new regime.

  108. Lisa, After being with you for so many years, I am not surprised, in fact, I am thrilled you are changing direction here when it is so needed, and I look forward to your words, as I have a strong feeling a lot of them will reflect where I and so many others find ourselves in these days of danger.
    My own bog of 11 years, has faltered, and my voice is very timid (not in person) in this time of change. People once kind, have become vicious. I am proud to say there are many in my family on the front lines of resistance and participating in local politics to affect change.
    Thank you so much!

  109. Lisa,
    I appreciate your willingness to speak up. Yes, I know what you mean…it is hard to be concerned about finding a perfect pair of jeans, couch, insert x here, when it feels like our country and government is being destroyed by calculating and cunning infiltrators. As a citizen and woman, I am appalled and horrified. We can’t let our progress take many steps back. March, talk to friends and neighbors, contact elected officials … we must be vigilant and speak up!

  110. Sorry to be so late to the farewell party, but wanted to chime in on how much I’ve enjoyed your blog over the years. And, of course, to echo as others have that I completely understand your decision. It has proved more and more difficult to write as though the world is continuing to spin merrily along when so much has changed. I’ll look forward to continue reading you here and there. Best of luck!

  111. You say ‘This is not my best writing’ but i disagree. Eloquent, honest, genuine as always. I will follow you on medium. xxxx

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